Run No: 46

Date: 21st June 2003 A City Run

Hares: Aqua and Monyet

About the Run

The run started off from the 6th floor of Orchard Towers and down the stairs

to the Anderson Road area, into Ladyhill and then to Botanical Gardens and out through Cluny Rd side and right through Botanical Gardens again , swinging back to Nassim Rd and into Stevens Road , cutting back into Anderson Road and from the back of Claymore hill and heading straight ahead to Orchard Towers 7th Floor and not from the Sixth floor where it all started……………


JM Handjob

Handjob announced that next month's run will be brought forward to the 12th of July because of the Kulai Hash and a big party being held by a Lion City fellow hasher on the 3rd week of July.

Double Back will be the hare for the month of July. Venue and run details will be posted on the web site.


In the absence of JM Red Baron,

JM Handjob introduced the virgins nervously as if she was a Virgin herself.

First Time virgins, Tommy (the Japanese), Geraldine and Angie were asked to sit on ice. Someone from the crowd volunteered to check if they were real virgins or not

Wonder if anyone was interested in checking Tommy or the ladies ???

First Time Kg hash Visitors Joey (Poofter), Zelly from the Philippines, Dick from London and a Malaysian Girl (did not get her name, pls. fill in MM )

GM Mother Mary called on the hares for the evening, Aqua and Monyet were put on ice and given a down, down for a very good run, considering it was a city run.

Tarnished Image exclaimed that there was not a Chalk Mark to be seen and Kamikaze commented that the first check point was unfortunately not at Muddy Murphy's. Two wrongs made it right and the run a high quality run and again,well done hares.


Whip charges for the evening.

Juicy Tang, Jay and Aqua were put on ice for being new members.

Popeye was grinning with pleasure when he had the pressure to put the GM Mother Mary on ice for doing other people's job. She was asked to sit on ice and she gracefully did a show of buns but a few of them wanted to see her G string, Auntie String and Granny String. Mother Mary exclaimed that she is a Granny alright but with no strings to show this time. Sorry folks …… better luck next time ……

Horny Pony and Double Back for not doing their own job of collecting the money but instead these two ladies went to wash up and make up just to look pretty so that they can sit on the ice looking pretty cool ……………

Nursefucker - Haberdasher was iced for not selling T-shirts during the Kampong Hash runs and yet he was busy chatting up young girls and sitting with young girls who were not wearing hash T-shirts.

Molester 2, Hooray, Dirty Hacker and Mouthful, were iced for being front runners, which never has happened in Kampong Hash history. Molester 2 made it to the front in 10 seconds, but this was due to the fact that whilst everyone else took the stairs, he and his cohorts took the elevator. Mouthful was acting as the elevator attendant with her finger at the right place and was holding on to the elevator for dear life ……… all four had a down down.

Rusty Tits was not just iced for talk, talk, talk according to Tightarse and he was seen making it to the 1st check going the wrong direction, with his co-partner Steve who was later in the evening Christened as "Fucking Whore" for his remarks that they could enjoy 4 floors of whores ………… either they were looking for whores or an excuse to watch the rugby match between England and Wales.

John "Dick" from London Hash was running like a chicken with its head chopped off. He was seen running all over the place and when we were in the Botanical garden he was seen running behind a civilian and not once did he say "On On". He was told to hold the check so that young man like Dirty Hacker can catch up with him.

Tommy San got lost in Botanical Gardens, imagine a Japanese getting lost in the Botanical Gardens. The Botanical garden has so much signs that even a blind man can't get lost. Tommy San then started checking the ice to see which was warmer to sit on and the whip said, now we know why he got lost at the Botanical Gardens ?


Ad Nauseam was iced next. Every time we hit a check he claims it is a T check so that everyone will check back, while he checks forward and calls On On 'cos it was a circle check , this way he gets to be in front all the time. At a real T-check, he found the paper but instead of confirming if it is the trail he called On On .

A phone rang out of the blues and it was Stephen Lee Road's phone and of course needless to say he was iced.

Brian, Slowcum's son was seen sleeping bare-bodied and half naked after the run and when the whip asked him, he claimed he was not sleeping to which the whip replied he looked dead for at least half an hour. The whip asked if he was tired from the run and how old he was. Brian replied he was 18 yrs old to the cheers of the other younger men in the crowd.

She is the Queen of all Flirts, no, a very mild statement she is the Flirt of the century and here Popeye was taking his shower trying very hard NOT to show off his bare body and there she walks in and asks him, Popeye can I shower in front of you with my G-String and to the delight of Popeye who is known never to say NO, to such requests could not stop nodding his head in agreement and suddenly out of the blues, Molester 2 appears with a plastic bottle filled with water to actually help his wife . The two of them were asked to sit on the ice and all this talk was surely melting the ice so fast and so quick that these two had to change their positions 3 times while sitting on the ice !!!!

The story goes as Up and Down was showering, her real performance of flirting came on show, there she was, trying to take off her bra and then trying to put them on and getting stuck and urging Popeye to hook her up and unhook her again and then walks in Paul to share in the fun and he too decided to shower in front of Popeyes car and keeping Up and down company and if that was not enough Wriggly Willie came to join in the fun , he was heard saying that, if Up and Down is watching, let me give her a show as well and did it stop there ??? From nowhere Mouthful decided to join in the action and offered to wash the willie of you know who …… is this an Orgy or what ? The close proximity of Orchard Towers had something to do with this frenzy ????

At the moment all of us noticed that Dirty Hacker went to cool his ass off a few times without being called upon, can it be that all this Whore talk was getting him sizzling hot !!!.

Strangely tonight we had 3 best dressed couples ………

Tightarse and Cat woman for their Batik Kampong Hash Shirt,

Ad Nauseam and Ugly bum in same pair of yellow looking T-shirts and

Stranger still was this couple - Fucking Whore and Bagless ????

As for this pair , the crowd was curious as to who would be on the top of who ???

We applaud the first 2 couples for dressing up as a pair but the 3rd couple, we suggest that they do this at the San Francisco Hash where such things are recognised.

All 3 couples were given a down, down.

AOB Delegator

Dogshit/Bagless/Vibrator was given a down, down for heading straight for the Pub

Ignoring the run completely, just to watch some 30 men chasing after a funny looking ball. Delegator went on to lead her version of the down down song (kanina ………)


Delegator was asked to sit on ice as No derogatories were allowed on the Kampong hash and Strapless did a special number for her.

Kamikaze announced that the American Day Run would be on the 4th of July at Seletar Camp and all are invited.

The circle ended at about 9.00 PM, the Run was good, The food was grand,

and the Whip was great, he displayed to all , that he was not just an Officer, but a Gentlemen too.

The On On continued on site and the On On On was at Hunter Pub belonging to Monyet. The hares promised 10 jugs but threw in more. Rusty Tits decided to hog the mike the whole night causing nightmare for the rest of us. Delegator, Palerider, Popeye and others sang in between to the relief of the rest.

Thank you Hares, Aqua and Monyet, for a terrific night.


Olive Oyl

Asst. ON Sec.